#there will be more to this

[formal-frog-shoes]

Am I making a Splatoon au? YES!!! Do I know most Splatoon lore? MAYBE!!!! Can I do interesting colour backgrounds? NO!!!!!

SPLATOON TURBO AND KING CANDY AU, Aka strange Cephalo-Roommates Au

From two different places, these two come together to rent a small apartment in Inkopolis. With the two spliting rent, and helping each other take care of a tired small fry called Sour Bill, Turbo and Candy have to figure out the next steps now that they've settled into this new city

Or something like that.

[wrencatte]

Don’t want to write the Joker, I say. How ‘bout just write the tail end, I say. In reality, just write the guy laughing. That’s his thing anyway, right?

HAHAhahaHaHAHa –

This is a dream. A nightmare. The concrete is cold under his cheek. Wet. Sticky. Jason blinks slowly. His ears are ringing. His chest hurts. Laughter echoes in his ears – hahahaHaHaHAHAHAHA – and he wants to scream. Everything hurts. A hand appears in his vision, shaking and trembling. It takes him a second to realize it’s his own hand. He watches it move from the ground closer, closer, dragging through redredred blood spreading under his face. One of his fingers is broken and the pain is dim, far away. He touches his face and – does he touch his face? Is he touching his face? Everything hurts. Everything is far, far away.

Then another hand. Not shaking. Not trembling. Not his?

Another hand appears, sliding under his face so, so gently. He whimpers at the contact. His vision blurs and it takes him a too long second to realize it’s because he’s crying. The hand lifts him up from the ground, holding him steady. A blob of black and grey appears in front of him – the blob might be talking. Might be talking to him, but – but Jason can only hear HAHAhahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. He squeezes his eyes shut, hunches in on himself. His hands come up on their own accord to cover his ears. Anything. Anything to block out that laughter. Please. Please. He’s been hearing it all night. All day.

“Please,” he thinks he says. “Make it stop. Make him stop.”

Laughter – HahahaHAHAHAHA HA HA ha ha ha hhhh – cuts off with a sudden snap.

Silence.

Jason opens his eyes and sees nothing but darkness. Then the darkness moves, and he sees a gold and black figure crouched over a mess of green and white and red and red and red. Cassandra stares back at him, her mouth pulled into a thin line, eyes wide and dark, glittering in the spotlights. Jason doesn’t look away, doesn’t look down at the body under her. Doesn’t want to know if it’s alive or dead even though he knows better, knows Cass. He wouldn’t want her to do it anyway. It wouldn’t be right. Wouldn’t be fair. She’s tried so, so hard to, to –

The darkness shifts into his line of sight. Jason looks up and up and Batman looks down and down. He blinks and tears streak his cheeks – and it burns. Jason gasps then chokes on it, heaving these deep, shuddering breaths. Arms wrap around him, and he’s pulled into the shadows of Batman’s cape. The shadows that are safe – they’re always safe. He’s never been scared of the dark because that’s where…that’s where –

Lips press to his temple, chapped and dry, but welcomed. “I have you, Jaylad,” Bruce murmurs against his ear. Jason’s breathing hitches. “I have you. You’re alright. You’re safe.”

He doesn’t rub comforting circles on Jason’s back, keeps the points of contact light and sparse. Jason wants more. The touch is grounding, tethering him back down to earth. He needs – he can’t float away. Not again. He doesn’t want to go away. His hands come up, clutch the edges of the cape. Pain sparks from his, from his broken hand. It’s not just his fingers. His hands have been smashed, by a crowbar – Jason squeezes his eyes shut as moremoremore laughter echoes. No. Fuck. He’s not here anymore, he tells himself. The, the bastard is not – Jason turns his face, dragging his cheek along an armored chest and he – cries out at the sudden pain.

[victusinveritas]

For those not in the know, this is one of the Amanita mushrooms referred to as a Destroying Angel. Never, ever, ever, ever forage with an app. Especially for mushrooms.

[knockknockwhosthereartistism]

I was inspired

[bitchfitch]

writing advice for characters with a missing eye: dear God does losing an eyes function fuck up your neck. Ever since mine crapped out I've been slowly and unconsciously shifting towards holding my head at an angle to put the good eye closer to the center. and human necks. are not meant to accommodate that sorta thing.

[faeriekit]

"This fic was ai generated—" Cool, so lemme block you real quick

[dredsina]

Ive said this before but swear the biggest skill to learn as an adult is how to resist high-pressure sales tactics. You do NOT have to answer questions with anything other than "Sorry I'm not interested." No matter how nice they are or no matter how many follow up questions they ask or even how agitated they get when you stand your ground. Just keep saying I'm not interested. Don't answer their questions. Don't give them an opening to try to push back on your reasons. Be a fucking brick wall of I'm not interested.

[captainjonnitkessler]

>Join a union

>Hear people constantly complaining that the current union leadership is super corrupt, it's all just the same ten guys making all the decisions in secret and nobody else in the union ever gets to know what's going on

>Go to the monthly union meetings that are completely open to all 1200 union members

>The only attendees are the same ten guys every month, giving detailed reports about everything that's going on

[mayhemchicken-artblog]

in the hour or so it took me to draw this op turned reblogs off

EDIT: reblogs are STAYING OFF. op was right and correct and i have never regretted making a post as much as this one. if you want to reblog my art you can reblog something else from my blog. or commission me, lord knows i deserve financial compensation for the nightmare this post has put me through

[memeclassheroes]

[enemywasp]

I'm sorry I keep posting my tiktok comments but please. What does this mean. What do people THINK shipping is for anymore???

[sirompp]

hi. i made some images.

feel free to take them and use for whatever you may need them for. no credit required

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Knowledge Revenge.

[stimmingandstruggling]

more good news from tiktok: they’ve started blocking celebrities.

they’re calling it block party 2024. just blocking and ignoring countless celebrities who havent said shit about palestine. influencers, actors, anyone who went to the met gala, whatever, they’re getting blocked. and people keep talking about how cathartic it is, how good it feels, how they never realized they could DO that. there was some kind of subconscious law against blocking famous people, but it’s broken, and people are LOVING it. and it’s WORKING. a social media/digital advertising coordinator was talking about how ad companies are PANICKING, because they can’t accurately target anymore. so many big influencers, including fucking LIZZO started talking about palestine the MOMENT their follower counts started going down. and the best part? no one is forgiving them. lizzo posted a tiktok asking people to donate to palestinian families, and all the comments just said you’re a multimillionaire. put your money where your mouth is. blocked.

i feel like i’m witnessing the downfall of celebrity culture, right here right now. people are waking up.

[chongoblog]

Me, after forgetting to cut the top off an onion before dicing it: “Aw dammit”

The Gordon Ramsey that lives in my head: “Don’t worry there, this mistake isn’t going to ruin anything. No need to be too hard on yourself”

Me: “Wow, that’s…not what I was expecting”

Gordon: “Of course, you ought to know by now that I don’t shout at cooks just to do so. I do it because the people in hit television show Kitchen Nightmares are putting their services out into the public and claim to be good enough to have the title of head chef. You’re just some guy in your twenties making beef stroganoff for yourself and your roommate. I’m kind of a dick, yeah, but I’m not gonna scream at you for a minor mistake like this”

Me: “Oh….well…thanks”

Gordon: “You’re welcome…cunt…”